Why do relationships make me feel like and emotional live-wire? Why do I find it completely embarrassing to discover the guy I was dating actually posted the status of our relationship -"complicated"- on his MySpace page? Why do I hate that he's been out back country skiing, w/ other girls and (god forbid) having fun...which he also posts on his MySpace page. Does it sound like maybe I've been stalking my ex's MySpace page? Because I have. A mutual friend walked into Costco today and threw out a few comments about how and what she knew of our relationship...MySpace. What the F?!?!
I find myself once again wrangling w/ claustrophobia in a job I mostly hate, living a life in one, small town, which I know drives me into depression, steadily loosing perspective on my life and so much more. What to do, what to do? I hate that I'm busy comparing myself to someone else and letting it get the better of me. I feel jealous, but not particularly inspired to change it. More infuriated. And seriously, what ever for? I know it's not worth my time and energy, but it rocks me and I struggle under the zap of envy. Blah. How fucking juvenile does this have to get for me to let it all go? I catch myself getting or being so angry, and it kills me to know I am burning it all up on that shit. I have soooooo many better things to be doing w/ my time! No more boys, for the love of Christ. No more boys!
5 comments:
You goob. I do so love you, and I'm sorry you hurt. Call me when you can. I'm around...
MySpace, does suck
me beeing emo a lot, over sensitive, over romantic and just love to be melancholic. you put some pics up showing the world your feelings telling everybody how nice and good all is, before you know it its just another chapter in the book. and you need to change and rename everything.
fuck those and those who come up to you and tell you your ex is dating this new guy cause the've seen new butterflies flying on her myspace
and she moved you from number 3 (never number 1) to number 37 in her friends list
im still in love with leo so i ive got the same new love slide for almost a 9 months now, shes so fucking cool and loving and boyish hope this one will never be as painfull as the last one. having to rename it into "always special 2"
he, i didnt even know you were on myspace
www.myspace.com/eddie_digital
or lets not (hihi)
all is well, a bit stressed out (arent i always) about the finances for my travels next year
could be worse!?
im changing jobs again pffffffffff again and again
came to a verry important conclusion, i dont want to be cooking on this level anymore, fuck 60 hour working weeks!
i have a job intervieuw tomorrow
"cooking with the crazy peoples"
yes indeed, ill be working with drug related psychotics and helping them to take care of themselves, foodwise.
woohoo im so happy you said my name in one of your previous post
yeah woohoo
i know your a lousy penpall cause yo told me so yourself, so a little word of you reminding me just makes my day. and yes i love you back, im sure we all do.
even though i dont know you at all, i think you are the coolest
writing so beautifull always, biking and adventerous.
im so happy we met that one day over a plate of food.
sweets when i will be in the states next year i would love to have another plate of food with you
a little snack everey couple of years doesnt sound like that much of a comitment does it
love you love you
x really do
p.s reading this really funny book about gay pirates at the moment, aaaaarrr
Allisa, this is your pilot friend,please call or text me let me know how you've been and how your trip was, I hope that your back. I know that this is kinda funny I found you on here if this is actually you, I hope, but I had no other way to do it. Get a hold of me I wanna talk to you. friend I've been wanting to get in touch with you but I lost my phone / your numerber
Allisa, sorry about how the spelling and nonsense that first comment turned out, I posted it through my phone and couldnt see what I was writting/reading. Well anyway. I really hope you get these from the looks of things it doesnt seem like you will or are going to get them because of the time it has been since you have been on here. This is all of course if I have the right Allisa by the way. But, I think I do. Like I said in the first comment though. I lost you, when I lost my other phone. You number was in it. Ive been wanting to see how your have been and I remember you saying youd be back by the end of sept. I was hoping you are back. Get a hold of me if you are or if you can. I would like to talk to you. I hope you are well and your trip/trips where awesome! By the way Myspace does suck, thats why I cancelled mine. haha. Get a hold of me.
where did you go? I miss reading all about the shit no one else but you and a few of us other lost souls write about. WTF? September 15? You know that writing this crap is not only a joy but a responsibility now and we love it/hate it. I can't wait for the next entry....and say hello to Eddie for me!!!!!!!
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